How to Support Someone with ADHD: A Guide for Family, Friends, and Colleagues
Published by Ian Wahlert, ADHD Coach | Encinitas, California
Living with someone who has ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) can be both rewarding and challenging. Whether you're a family member, friend, or colleague of an adult with ADHD, understanding how to provide meaningful support can transform relationships and improve everyone's quality of life.
As an ADHD coach in Encinitas who has lived with ADHD myself, I've seen firsthand how proper support can make a life-changing difference for both individuals with ADHD and their loved ones.
Understanding Adult ADHD in North County Communities
Adult ADHD affects millions of people, yet it's often misunderstood or undiagnosed. Here in Encinitas and the surrounding North County San Diego area, our vibrant community of entrepreneurs, students, and high-performing professionals includes many individuals navigating ADHD challenges.
Research shows that entrepreneurs are more likely to have ADHD traits than the general population. The same qualities that drive innovation and creative thinking—hyperfocus, risk-taking, and thinking outside the box—can also create daily life challenges.
For students at local institutions like MiraCosta College and Cal State San Marcos, undiagnosed ADHD can significantly impact academic performance despite high intelligence. Similarly, many high-achieving professionals in our area struggle with executive function challenges that don't match their intellectual capabilities.
Recognizing ADHD Symptoms in Adults
Understanding what adult ADHD looks like is the first step toward providing effective support. Common ADHD symptoms include:
Difficulty maintaining focus during conversations or meetings
Chronic procrastination and trouble with time management
Impulsive decision-making and interrupting others
Seeming disorganized despite multiple attempts to create systems
Emotional regulation challenges, including quick frustration
Starting many projects but struggling to complete tasks
Chronic lateness and forgetfulness
"These challenges aren't due to laziness or lack of effort," I emphasize as an ADHD coach who understands these struggles personally. "Most adults with ADHD are working twice as hard as others just to keep up."
The Impact of ADHD on Relationships
ADHD relationships often face unique challenges. Partners frequently find themselves taking on more household responsibilities or repeatedly reminding their loved ones about appointments and commitments. Friends may feel hurt by forgotten plans, and colleagues might become frustrated by missed deadlines.
The emotional toll on the person with ADHD is equally significant. Many of my ADHD coaching clients come to me feeling deeply ashamed, having internalized messages that they're unreliable or incapable, leading to anxiety, depression, and diminished self-worth.
How to Support Someone with ADHD: 5 Evidence-Based Strategies
1. Offer Understanding, Not Judgment
ADHD behaviors aren't choices or character flaws. Simply saying "I know you're trying your best" can be incredibly validating for someone struggling with ADHD symptoms.
2. Acknowledge Their Intentions
People with ADHD typically have excellent intentions but struggle with execution. Remember that forgetfulness or lateness isn't about disrespecting you—it's a manifestation of executive function challenges.
3. Encourage Professional ADHD Support
ADHD coaching, therapy, and sometimes medication can be transformative. Suggesting these resources with compassion, rather than criticism, makes a significant difference. Professional ADHD coaching provides personalized strategies and accountability.
4. Create Collaborative Systems
Rather than taking over responsibilities, work together to create external supports like shared calendars, reminder systems, or ADHD-friendly organizational tools.
5. Appreciate Their Strengths
ADHD often comes with gifts like creativity, problem-solving abilities, innovation, and high energy. Recognizing these positive traits helps balance the focus on challenges.
Local ADHD Coaching Support in Encinitas
My practice, ADHD Coaching Life, offers specialized adult ADHD coaching in the North County San Diego area. As someone who has lived with ADHD myself and brings both a background in psychology and extensive corporate experience, I understand the daily struggles and the feeling of not living up to your potential.
What makes my ADHD coaching approach unique is the incorporation of nature into the coaching process. For my local clients, we often conduct ADHD coaching sessions while walking at Batiquitos Lagoon. Being in nature while moving physically is incredibly beneficial for the ADHD brain—it improves focus, reduces anxiety, and creates the perfect environment for productive conversations.
The Benefits of Nature-Based ADHD Coaching
Walking therapy and nature-based coaching have proven benefits for individuals with ADHD:
Improved focus and attention
Reduced anxiety and stress
Enhanced creative problem-solving
Better emotional regulation
Increased physical activity (beneficial for ADHD management)
When to Seek Professional ADHD Help
Consider suggesting professional ADHD support if you notice:
Persistent struggles with time management and organization
Impact on work performance or relationships
Emotional distress related to ADHD symptoms
Difficulty managing daily responsibilities
Low self-esteem or feelings of failure
Finding ADHD Support in San Diego County
If you're looking for ADHD coaching in California, particularly in the Encinitas, Carlsbad, Del Mar, or broader North County area, professional support is available. Adult ADHD coaching focuses on developing personalized strategies, improving executive function, and building confidence.
Moving Forward with ADHD Understanding
My message to both those with ADHD and those who care about them is simple: ADHD is a different way of processing the world—not a defect. With the right understanding and support, adults with ADHD can not only manage their challenges but also leverage their unique strengths.
Remember, supporting someone with ADHD is about patience, understanding, and recognizing that their brain works differently. With proper ADHD coaching and support systems, individuals with ADHD can thrive in all areas of life.
Ready to Learn More About ADHD Coaching?
If you're interested in ADHD coaching services in the Encinitas area or want to learn more about supporting someone with ADHD, I'm here to help. My approach combines personal experience, professional training, and the healing power of nature to create effective ADHD management strategies.
Contact ADHD Coaching Life today to schedule a consultation and discover how professional ADHD coaching can make a difference in your life or the life of someone you care about.
About Ian Wahlert: Ian is a certified ADHD coach based in Encinitas, California, serving the North County San Diego area. With personal experience living with ADHD, a background in psychology, and extensive corporate experience, Ian offers unique insight into the challenges and strengths of adult ADHD. His nature-based coaching approach helps clients develop practical strategies while enjoying the therapeutic benefits of Batiquitos Lagoon and other beautiful North County locations.
